In addition, we are beginning to see that, while traditional youth ministry is effective in getting teens to come to church, it is equally in effective in retaining them beyond their high school years. Traditional youth ministry all too often fails to bring teens to adult spiritual maturity by helping them to become active members of the body of Christ. First, family-based youth ministry involves a different philosophy for youth ministry.
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Simply put, family- based youth ministry is grounded upon the Biblical conviction that parents are the primary disciplers of their children. Youth ministers have known for years that, as a general rule, children usually emulate the same spiritual fervor of their parents, whether positive or negative. While traditional youth ministry often attempts to fight this reality e. And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all t hy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.
His role is not minimized, but simply refocused on the family as a whole.
Second, family-based youth ministry involves a different program for youth ministry. As mentioned, traditional youth ministry often isolates youth from the rest of the church body. In contrast, family-based youth ministry strives for a more balanced, family -friendly program. Here are some programming principles to follow:. A family-friendly program considers family schedules and needs when planning activities.
Churches should avoid keeping teensout on activities all week long, especially sincefamilies are spending less and less timetogether. Perhaps a family-friendly programwould cancel the Thanksgiving weekendretreat since that is traditionally a family time. Weird, Crude, Funny, and Nude: Looking for a great youth ministry tool? Help young people explore the strangest parts of the Bible with plenty of laughs and plenty of Jesus.
Review "Mark is absolutely right in his assessment of the direction youth ministry needs to go in the future. Related Video Shorts 0 Upload your video. My Kid's Prayer Journal: Children's Journal to Inspire Creating Sacred Moments at Home. Out of the Fog: Should you stay or should you go? Will this time be different? Will they ever change, or will they just get better at hiding what they are up to?
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There was a problem filtering reviews right now. Please try again later. After seeing appalling abuses of the term "family-based" ministry I need to weigh in on the subject. Some churches have actually scraped their youth ministry and Sunday Schools in preference of their misinterpretation of the concept of a "family-based" ministry. These churches now feel justified in shirking their responsibility to train the youth in Christian principles arguing that these separate classes and groups take the youth out of the life of the church body.
In his book, "Family-Based Youth Ministry", Mark DeVries does make the assertion that the current youth group model we have been following, if that is all a church is doing for it's youth, fails the youth by not connecting them with adults within the body of the church. I think these church leaders only read chapter three, found the rational to be lazy, then stopped reading. At the end of most chapters DeVries actually does suggest suspending the regular youth program but gives an alternative direction to pursue.
By reading only half the sentence and disregarding the new directive church leaders are causing a catastrophe to the Christian church of tomorrow by not seeing to the proper training of the youth today. I do not think DeVries was intending to give lazy leaders an excuse to stop doing youth ministry. Before scraping your Sunday School class or mid-week youth group read the whole book.
In the final chapter DeVries says to begin family-based youth ministry as an "undercover or mustard-seed kind of ministry. Many of the suggestions he gives are quite easy to implement. For instance, letting the kids be the greeters, hand out the bulletins, and participate in the praise band. The hardest thing about that is putting aside traditions your church may have developed like insisting that only the elders or deacons can be greeters.
The music director might have to be willing to settle for less then a perfect worship performance. Some of the suggestions are harder, like teaching a parenting class or teaching parents to be the real spiritual mentors of their kids. This may mean that you will need to become an expert in parenting yourself.
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A commitment of this level may get in the way of other pet projects. It may get in the way of the pastors quiet routine as he slides towards retirement. A real roadblock to this initiative is the deterioration of the nuclear family. As an alternative DeVries recommends several ways we can connect the kids to spiritually mature adults with the greater Body of Christ.
This too is conditional on having spiritually mature adults in your church family. My admonition, in any case, is to suck it up and get off your lazy cabooses. Hired youth pastors and committed volunteers can be a major spiritual influence in the life of a teen. But this influence pales in comparison to the lasting influence parents have in the life of their kids.
You must enlist the parents in the youth ministry process. In some cases we must first see to the spiritual growth of the parents before we can expect them to properly mentor their kids.
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But we cannot let the size of the task stop us from beginning. So I recommend that you read the book -the whole book. Don't scrap a great Sunday school program until you have a better alternative to replace it with. See the rest of my family-based youth ministry suggestions and resources at my website: Sunday School Lesson Connection: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase. I have a grandaughter who is entering middle school in September, and thus will be part of the "youth group". Although previously, I believe that our church has done a great job of integrating our youth into the church as a whole, this book can be invaluable in helping further that goal.
But, I do remember different aspects of growing up "in" the church, assisting with teaching a Sunday school class, boys growing up and participating in reading scripture, prayers, leading singing, etc.
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This book offers very simple and detailed ideas for incorporating our youth into all aspects of church instead of isolating them. Although it does "NOT" do away with the fun aspects, it does encourage involvement for all ages from early childhood to senior aged adults so that the youth learn by teaching and example, how to become a mature Christian. Building a youth ministry that does not integrate the various aspects of its members lives creates a false "compartmentalized world" that makes it difficult for kids to see how faith applies in all areas of their present lives.
And as DeVries says, this model does not prepare youth for life beyond the youth ministry. One of the most important jobs parents have is to prepare children for adulthood; a youth ministry without this same perspective will find itself doing a disservice to the kids in this regard, in spite of all the good otherwise being done. The way the kids learn about the world beyond their insulated youth ministry is to be exposed to it. This doesn't mean requiring the kids to participate in the most boring event going on in the church, but it means finding ways to integrate parents into the youth ministry and youth into the church.
DeVries' observations and ideas resonate with important ideas I've seen in other contexts, too. Henry Cloud in " Changes that Heal " discusses the developmental importance of teens having relationships with non-parent adults-- for example, coaches, teachers, youth ministers. They learn to deal with these adults independently of their parents, separating from their parents as a normal part of growth but still being connected to other mature influences.
Family-Based Youth Ministry
It is evident that parents of friends and other adults in the spiritual community can help nurture teens in in ways that peer relationships, the youth ministry and parents cannot. Scripturally, parents cannot delegate their role to the youth ministry. DeVries encourages creative thinking for how to get parents and the youth ministry working together for the long-term benefit of the teens. He also provides some practical ideas of his own, with each chapter ending with some great ideas about how to put the ideas of that chapter into practice.
Being a parent of a teen is no easy thing, and being a youth minister is no easy thing either. It's great to have a great youth ministry be a part of your child's world, and it's great to have parents be involved in the youth ministry instead of just dropping the kids off and picking them up when the events are over.
And it's great to have a church enriched by the involvement of teens its activities as well.